Plaxico is All About Guns in Church

Here's some of the wackier news floating around the country, and true to form, Arkansas is behind the wheel, dipping and diving through a stretch of redneckery that had previously been uncharted, even by the most slack-jawed of affiliates.

A bill was filed last Tuesday to repeal the stifling and antiquated and remarkably sane ban on guns in church. House Bill 1237 would remove the "church or any place of worship" bit out of the lists of places that one cannot carry concealed heat; long-winded priests and pastors everywhere will now have added motivation to wrapping up an homily or sermon on a big-game Sunday.

With churches out of the way, now legislature can finally make some progress and get this pesky ban lifted in nursing homes, day cares, maximum-security prisons and nuclear submarines. That way we can get down to the bidness of protecting that most hallowed of amendments: lucky number two.

Sarcasm aside, the cognitive faculties of those in the Arkansas Legislature seem to be lacking, or at least in one instance.

The bill calls to lift a ban, as advocates say it is an infringement on liberties. That may be fine. Bring the guns into church. Lord knows we need protection from those who might mean to do religious people harm. I don't know of any chemically-balanced persons who struggle with leaving their gun at home when they go to worship, but maybe I'm not broadening my narrow-minded horizons enough.

My problem with the entirety of the bill is this: Law or no, people are still (apparently) going to do it. It's that whole "concealed" part that helps people get away with it. I guarantee you — in fact, I know from personal experiences — that people do bring guns into church anyway.

It's these Plaxico types you really have to worry about. Because whether or not there is a law prohibiting the carrying of guns or not, or even whether the person in question has a permit to make such a weapon clandestine, it's going to happen.

All this law does is give these genuinely sick people a little more credibility. Hey, they'll say, this is a new law. You can't prosecute me, just because a misfire happened within the pews of a sanctuary, God forbid.

I'll hear the argument that this may better protect someone in case of some kind of jihadist who may burst into a church and open fire, but if you're going to a church where you can envision this in the foreseeable future, I suggest you find a new congregation.

So maybe I don't have a problem with the legislation so much as the thoughts that are immediately associated with it. They say guns don't kill people, people kill people, or something like that.

Sure; but let's not give those people any impetus to maybe start adding heat to that brimstone and hellfire.