DOUBLE Caption Contest! Happy Grad-u-muh-kay-shun, son & Hey! Someone Who Will Never Be On TV Again!

In honor of those graduating this weekend, here's a caption contest blast from the past with everyone's favorite gaffe-expert.

Here's some starters:

• "My roommate Brian dared me to ask you this but..."
• "Son, could you show me how to properly hold a man down while you beat him in the head?"
• Kid: "I'm just a yellow belt."
  Bush: "HAH! BLACK BELT HERE!"

And I thought this picture was pretty funny looking, courtesy of Blake's Artificially Intelligent Panzer, via Lance Turner's Failed Attempt at Anonymity Blog. I look like I'm Otis, the Town Drunk, to reference Kim Hendren's beloved Andy Griffith Show, of which I too am a fan.
Here's the ball rolling on this one, too.

• "Sorry I'm out of breath Rachel; me and the guys here in Little Rock just had a hot dog eating contest."
• "Pants? No, no I'm not. As you can tell by my lack of necktie, this is casual."
• Stovall pauses to take a breath after savagely beating the intern who originally spelled his name 'Zach Stovel.'

Last week's winner was Bobby Simpson, of North Little Rock. He was handsomely rewarded with a coffee mug. No, seriously. Submit and I'll give you something if you win, one for each picture this week. Now. Have at you.